Abby discussed her summer working with Poker News and how it allowed her to meet and become friends with many of her poker idols. She explained her content creation strategy and how her experience as a reporter interviewing players about their strategies helped her improve her own game by learning about different approaches and perspectives. Abby also discussed her journey to becoming a professional poker player and shared a hand she played with Stephen Chidwick. She analyzed her betting strategy and decision-making process, discussing the range of hands Chidwick could have and ultimately deciding to fold on the river to a shove. The group discussed the importance of having a plan and being able to adjust when necessary, as well as the psychology of bluffing and the social dynamics of poker. They also talked about what comes next for Abby and the importance of letting loose at a karaoke bar every now and then!

Jim announced the upcoming RecPoker Weekend and encouraged listeners to attend. He also mentioned a bounty placed on him by his friend and nemesis Phil in event number two and explained that only RecPoker members can participate. Chris Jones asked about becoming a member, and Jim explained that it’s free and easy to sign up.

Jim and John Somsky recognized the winners of several poker games and offered them prizes. They emphasized the importance of staying involved in the community and highlighted the correlation between engagement and success. Plus we give away a free prize at the end for folks in the YouTube chat. Join us LIVE on YouTube next Monday at 7:30 ET for free to ask our guests questions in real time, and you can win too!

Abby is active on Twitter as @‌abbypoker34 and on Instagram and TikTok as @‌abbypoker

We also go over this week’s home game results and discuss these topics:
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Go Premium! – https://rec.poker/premium/

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RecPoker is a vibrant and encouraging poker learning community. We are committed to learning the game, but our priority is building healthy relationships where we can not only grow in the game, but grow in our enjoyment of life. The free membership website at rec.poker is awesome, but it’s just a tool to help us build that community. You can join for FREE, giving you access to the groups, forums, and other member benefits. If you want to enjoy the premium content, or become part of the RECing Crew, those options are available, and you can get $10 off your first payment using the code RECPOKER. Music by Peter Troolin, [email protected].

Time Stamps

This was my reaction when I found out that one of the people I was working with at the WSOP – not in my direct team – went a MONTH and a HALF without a hairbrush. This was not an unkempt or unattractive man, although someone’s attractiveness unfairly gives them credit for doing certain things to maintain that attractive veneer.

Once, I forgot my brush when I was working the WSOP when it was still at the Rio. Ask me if I’d bought a brush at the first break in action. Yep, I did. I already feel as a woman that I have enough in my purse to build shelter if stranded on an island, with lip balm and a mirror to signal planes above. Maybe a snack or two is in there in a Ziploc with a napkin and spoon. And when I work the WSOP, my backpack has backpacks, that have lunch bags, that have lipstick, lip balm, etc.

I have moments of amnesia where I forget I’m a woman who works in poker, a teeny tiny minority. And then I have glaring moments of clarity, such as the brush conversation of ’22. A lot of what I do to prepare and work in poker is internal, like a lot of women’s inner dialogues; ones that are so natural to us that talking about them usually doesn’t occur to us or isn’t encouraged as a talking point as a society.

Part of how I prepare is what I wear. What I wear to play poker is carefully thought out; if not the outfit, how I want to feel before I go through the sliding doors that’ll lead me to a poker room. Unlike when I lived in Maui and had to do a spot check before I went anywhere in public, seeing if there’s a bra and appropriate clothing involved, when I play poker, I don’t leave anything to chance.

I used to like to dress in a feminine way when I would go play poker, curl my hair, check my makeup. I liked to look wholesome and approachable, but not too approachable. I wanted to feel like a baller inside, and I didn’t want to have to think about my clothing once I got to the table. Dresses with WSOP sweatshirts, jeans and a cashmere sweater, sometimes cute professional jackets over dresses. I never wanted to have too much cleavage because I didn’t want too much attention on me, I wanted to be absorbed into the game, into the banter, be comfortable.

I don’t want to say that I don’t appreciate women that have cleavage at the table. I love women who dress however the F they want to. We’re WOMEN, and there are many ways to dress and comport ourselves as women. We can wear hoodies and sweatpants ourselves, just like the majority of male poker players do. We can have cleavage if we want to. We can dress for comfort. The fact is that most poker rooms – and casinos in general – feel like meat lockers, like they’re trying to keep people alive and awake, as on many senior bus trips.

Clothes as a layer between me and the world

I usually like to write columns that touch on the absurdity of poker, the fun of it all, the craziness, the mishmash of all aspects of society. The fact that the Commerce offered multiple pairs of men’s underwear, but no panties for me to be seen. I like to remind myself why; why I love it. Why even when I’m in the middle of the WSOP looking at the carpet to see if I could lay down and no one would notice – and then realizing ‘heck no I’d never lay on that carpet if you paid me’ – to remind myself why I’m not in a cubicle listening to a woman talking about buying khaki pants at Penny’s every day for a while as I feel my life ebbing away. (Yes, I worked with Penny pants in a non-poker related job.)

Clothing for me is a layer between me and the world, between me and other players. I think about what I’m going to wear when I take out my trash (God forbid it’s too revealing, and it’s nighttime) even though my (male) neighbor almost never wears a shirt… ever.

I think about what I wear as a defense too; a shield, rendering me invisible or very visible. We need an extra layer of protection in this world, even as we’re scanning the perimeter for escape routes, or just how to get back to our car safely. I stopped playing at the Commerce after dark, mostly because of safety, the neighborhood, the walk back to my car. Some people think it’s being “too” safe, but too safe is still a mental buffer where we feel SAFE.

Last night after the poker session, I walked one of the players (a lady in her 60s) to her car.

It breaks my heart that women are (understandably) afraid in situations like that.

I guess we can’t change the way the world is, but we can at least “be the change”.

Offer to help.

— Robbie Strazynski (@cardplayerlife) September 18, 2022

It may seem silly to make a big deal about what you wear to a cardroom, but women are judged by what we wear, and I’m sure men are, too, but I can only speak to women. Separate from whatever you think happened with Robbi Jade Lew and Garret Adelstein, her appearance has been a big factor in how she’s been judged. And in other cases, such as assault, or crimes against women: “WHAT WAS SHE WEARING?” echoes as such a big and persistent question. I should be able to play poker wearing whatever I want without fear. Plus, women also judge other women, so in a way we’re screwed no matter what, so wear whatever makes you happy is where I aspire to be.

Asking other women poker players their process

As it’s a topic that – to the best of my knowledge – really hasn’t been thoroughly explored, I’ve asked some wonderful women in poker to share their thought processes in deciding what they wear to play poker, and I was excited at hearing their inner dialogues.

Terry King

“I think I’ve changed with age. I had a nice figure… I’m sure I flaunted it to some extent. I think many women dress for other women. I’m probably guilty at times. And dressing for men. I think as I’m older now, I dress for myself. Mostly I’m comfortable. But when I go out, I try to be presentable.

My mom had a saying. ‘Didn’t she look in the mirror before she left home?!’ She was a hoot. I had a friend who would dress a bit provocatively, but get incensed if anyone made remarks. ‘I should be able to wear whatever I want to play poker, without hearing comments.’ I said yes, but people are free to say what they want. So put on some appropriate clothes and go make some money. It’s detracting from your play if it bothers you.”

Terry King is the 1978 WSOP Women’s 7-Card Stud Champion, the administrator of the Facebook group Action Now Sports Poker, and is a member of the Women in Poker Hall of Fame class of 2022.

Linda Johnson

“For me, comfort at the poker table regarding my clothing is always most important. I dress very similar for cash games and tournaments. What I choose to wear is more based on the time of year and the weather, and whether or not the casino I am playing in is extremely cold or has an average temperature. I usually wear something long-sleeved, as many poker rooms are a bit chilly in Las Vegas because of the air conditioning.

I tend to dress slightly better for a Ladies’ event and definitely a lot better for a live streamed televised event. I think it is important to represent the poker community well when the event is streamed or televised.”

Linda Johnson was inducted into the Poker Hall of Fame in 2011, was the inaugural WPT Honors recipient in 2017, won her WSOP bracelet in the 1997 $1,500 Limit Razz event, and is also the cofounder of the Tournament Director’s Association (TDA) and co-owner of Card Player Cruises.

Chris Read

“I don’t ever wear clothes to use sexuality to distract or throw guys off. I want to be taken seriously no matter what I’m playing, cash or tournament. That said, I wear what I refer to as my ‘poker queen outfit’ to my Day 2s and live streams. It’s just comfy pants and my Poker Queen Jersey with cami. I wear it for recognition purposes and for my brand. On Day 1s I just either wear something nice that makes me feel good or yoga pants and a t-shirt for comfort.

So many people have stopped me and said you’re the girl who wears the Queen Jersey.

I have no issue with women who try to use sexuality to get ahead in the game, but personally I want them to remember my brain and how competitive I am more than anything else!”

Chris Read has over $250,000 in career tournament winnings according to HendonMob.com. She’s also got the YouTube Channel “Chris Read Em & Weep- Poker, Places and Personalities,” and founded the Facebook group Poker Queens.

Abby Merk

“When I decide what to wear at the table, it doesn’t matter if it is a cash game or a tournament because it is going to be predominantly men either way. I like to dress conservatively (so that I am able to play free of fear that I will be objectified and sexualized), comfortably (because I will most definitely be playing long hours) and warmly (since it is always cold in those rooms, lol). If it is a ladies’ event, I still stick with the last two points but the first I don’t cater to as much.

Comfort is absolutely an important element due to the fact that you’re going to be sitting a lot. I would never wear jeans, high heels, or honestly even makeup unless I’m playing on a live stream. I would also never try and use my body to throw men off their game. I think that is something that would make me feel severely uncomfortable. I would like to be known for being respectable and for me personally dressing sexy ‘to distract’ is not a way I would ever go about presenting myself.

I would like to be known for my game play ability and my personality at the table, not what I wear or what I look like.”

Abby Merk is a poker player and Teacher with Poker Power, a “club led by women, for young women, with the primary goal of utilizing the game of poker to aid in everything from building confidence, challenging the status quo, learning strategy and assessing risk.”

Kyna England

“I don’t play a lot of cash games but when I do plan to go play anything, I always try to be sporty, comfy and cute. For the most part if I feel cute, I am more confident. Look good, feel good!

Obviously if I know I am going to be on a stream or TV table, I might think through what I wear a bit more. I just dress for the mood I’m in. If I want to dress a little cuter on one day I will, but it’s generally a combination of top, hoodie and yoga pants.”

Kyna England is a poker player with $845,239 in total live earnings according to HendonMob.com. She was named the Mid-States Poker Tour Player of the Year in 2021, the first woman to ever hold the title. She’s also ClubGG’s brand ambassador and a Poker Power instructor.

Dude, where’s my brush?

Reading these other women’s answers made me feel a few things:

• Casinos will try to progressively freeze you, so comfort and warmth is always a thought.
• How we represent ourselves to the world is a very individual and personal decision, and it helps to know how other women think and process the world around them, and I can’t wait to learn more.
• And… I’d still be horrified by the coworker with no brush…

A seat at a No-Limit Hold ‘em table at the World Series of Poker (WSOP) in Las Vegas was not somewhere I saw myself two years ago. But my journey through the world of poker has offered surprises and opportunities I never would have banked on.

The 2021 WSOP Ladies Event

Girls don’t play poker

Poker wasn’t really supposed to be in the cards for me. It’s a game for rich old men in smoke-filled casinos, not philosophy students at North Carolina’s Wake Forest University. And, well — elephant in the room time — it’s especially not for young females. Growing up, my exposure to poker was limited to seeing my dad watch it on TV. Put simply, there was no reason for a young girl to learn how to play poker.

It took me a while to move past that bias, but I now realize there is more to poker than amassing chips and hustling your fellow players. The game is a gateway to building confidence and acquiring life skills. Gender should not be a barrier to learning money management or risk assessment — skills that become second nature to a poker player.

Dealing myself in

I’m a very competitive person and really love playing games, strategy games in particular, so my friends and I signed up for a course from Poker Power, an organization that teaches women to play poker as a way to acquire valuable life skills. After the first lesson, I was intrigued. Pretty soon, I was hooked. By the end of the course, my amazing instructor Sarah Stefan had become a mentor, and I wound up playing games with her entourage of professional players, like Kyna England. While I dove into a myriad of other poker resources, including Solvers, the Poker Power mission meant so much to me that I wanted to continue working with them.

I became a collegiate ambassador for Poker Power to encourage women to sign up and hopefully experience some of the amazing effects the game had on me. Using the networking skills I’d amassed through my lessons, I connected with people at the organization and last summer, I became an official Poker Power instructor.

From learning to teaching to competing

Learning the game as a student is rewarding, but nothing compares to teaching. I’d been able to apply my own passion to poker, but here was a chance to see how applicable it can be to women at every stage of their lives and careers. From high school students with no networking experience to seasoned professionals looking for the killer instinct to secure high-dollar deals, it’s thrilling to see how they develop. Every week, I hear stories of women empowered by what they’ve learned. Through poker, they’re building the confidence to achieve things they haven’t been able to do before. That’s inspiring, and I hope it continues.

That’s what made my trip to the WSOP so humbling and exhilarating. I felt like I was representing everyone who dared to tackle the impossible and defy expectations. To prepare, I enlisted the help of some friends and players I respect to point out any holes in my game. One overarching theme of advice caught me off guard: “you care too much about the money.”

What does that even mean? Of course I care about the chips! But what they were ultimately telling me was to take risks and not allow fear to dictate my decisions. You can look at each play by its end result and the cash value, or you can ask yourself if you would repeat that same move in another game. Analyzing that metric helps me learn more about my approach to things beyond poker, and the advice proved prophetic at the WSOP.

The World Series of Poker

Poker is a game of resilience. You will make mistakes. You will lose. And as tempting as it is to blame the cards, that’s no way to progress as a player. My first WSOP event was the Millionaire Maker, and, spoiler alert, I’m not writing this with seven figures in my bank account.

Here’s Abby Merk, bagging a stack in the 2021 WSOP Millionaire Maker event

In a field that started with around 6,000 players, I was 10 away from cashing in. I could have easily folded into the money, but I was playing to win. That’s what poker has taught me to do, and, with a pair of queens in my pocket, I felt good about my chances.

But one opponent was much more aggressive than I expected, consistently calling and raising, forcing me to wonder exactly what sort of hand he must’ve been holding. I should have put him on the ropes more to make the hard decisions, but I allowed myself to react to his play instead. I was so uncertain; I even admitted which cards I was holding to gauge his response, which only fueled my confusion.

I was the 90% favorite to win that hand, but he got lucky on the river and ended up with a backdoor flush. I was pretty embarrassed. I only tilt when I play the hand incorrectly, and I feel like I did in this instance. Poker — and life — are not meant to be measured solely by results. I gave myself permission to be upset for a few minutes and then had to move on and prep myself for the next event.

As a result, I was in the zone for the four-day Ladies No-Limit Hold ’em Championship. About 700 women signed up, and it can be eye-opening not having men at the table. There’s normally two types of guys you encounter in poker as a young woman: those who underestimate you and decide that you’re incapable of bluffing, and the ones who assume you’re overeager and bluff exclusively.

First WSOP and first cash in the ladies event championships. Thanks so much to the people that make the magic happen. I had an amazing time. #femalepokerplayer #poker #pokerplayer #wsop #WSOP #ladiesevent #pokerpower #flipthetable pic.twitter.com/9BdDm8My9M

— Abby Merk (@AbbyMerk34) October 13, 2021

Once you suss out who you’re dealing with, you can take advantage of their blind spots, but an all-female table is an entirely different environment. My style of play is usually more reserved and secretive, but with the women, we were friendly almost to a fault. I was genuinely cheering on my opponents, bonding with them, and celebrating their victories. I gave the woman who took me out a hug afterwards! I would never do that with men. Kudos to the WSOP for providing a place where we support each other’s poker journey.

Dinner break in the @WSOP ladies event with this amazing group of women! Gl ladies! @Ebony_Kenney @MarleSpragg @JenShahade @_AshleySleeth_ @mandy22baker @JamieKerstetter pic.twitter.com/iFQBcUSPTk

— Lexy Gavin (@LexyGavinPoker) October 12, 2021

That’s such a key factor I think in why women might shy away from poker. Just about every female poker player has a distressing story of being mistreated at the table. Even now, poker is marketed to and designed for the old-school demographic. But as women step up and start playing, men need to be allies. If you see us facing sexism, please speak up. It makes a big impact and can really start turning the game around and making it more accessible for everyone.

How poker transformed my job prospects

Poker has opened so many doors for me. My majors are philosophy and math, and I was uncertain where I wanted my career to go. I found the finance world interesting but never had exposure to it. Though nontraditional, poker became an ideal way to practice those skills. I took part in an internship training women to become traders over the summer, and the parallels to poker were remarkable. Now armed with courage and determination, I ultimately applied for a role on the PEAK6 Investments trading team, and I landed it! The power of poker gave me the confidence to go for it, and it helped me land a job in a traditionally male-dominated industry.

Of course, I’ll continue honing my poker skills. There are many games and charity events that can serve as great practice for the higher-stakes tournaments down the line. I definitely hope to make a return to the WSOP.

Sitting in class right now daydreaming about the series…. Take me back to WSOP!!! #wsop #school #poker

— Abby Merk (@AbbyMerk34) October 21, 2021

To say that poker has been life-changing would be an understatement. In just two years, I’ve met amazing people, learned vital skills, discovered a new career, and competed in a million-dollar tournament. There’s no telling what will happen when you get in the game and take your seat at the table.